Different Grains are used for different things!


My paternal aunt wrote to me some time ago, with the above quote. It is in regard to my accident recovery. The analogy of grain becoming bread only after it is processed, refers to when the Shepherd’s care happens in quiet places where we are strengthened. It is often in the quiet, that we hear the still voice.  A slower pace can help the soul heal. 



During my time in the Valley of Shadow, still waters (Psalm 23:2-3) are not just a pretty picture to me; they are a mercy. I am learning that being honest about creating margins for rest and renewal, is not a weakness or detour. Creating these margins, is about being honest about the need for shepherding love, rest, and renewal. 



It is hard for me to share about the intellectual and psychological deficits  (2 Corinthians 12:9) I am having. This has been a slow, humbling process that gives me perspectives on what patients go through. It is interesting being a patient, rather than the medical treating professional. There are many days where I do not feel like Joshua Michael-Sievers. There are days when I wonder how I can be of use to the Kingdom of God on this planet. 


My bad days are when it takes extra effort to concentrate; there are gaps in my memory or processing. My short term memory is very bad. The year of 2025, seems a blur to me. Often I can't remember the names of people who came into my life in the year of 2025. Sometimes I spend the entire day fatigued, with little energy,  grasping with the emotional toll of  not feeling like myself. Some days I try to fight against my deficits, pushing harder out of fear that accepting these limitations means giving up, on. trying to return to who I was. I’m learning that grief and frustration can exist alongside determination, and that naming what’s happening to ne is not weakness—it’s the first step toward adapting wisely and taking steps towards creating margins for restoral and renewal.



On some days, I feel like my old self. I feel energy in every fibre of my being. These could be the days where I play at a church (1 Peter 4:10) or go for a run with my parents’ poodle, or help a patient medically. These small success makes me feel, like I can slowly but surely work towards being completely healed.   



While things have not been easy, I want to express my gratitude  (James 1:17).  I have found a massage therapist to treat me for my Whiplash Disorder. A psychologist and a neuropsychologist who were trained in the USA and both hold PhDs, are helping me deal with the huge changes in my life, as well as the issues that come from Post-Concussion Syndrome (PCS). These seasoned professionals are trying to help me repair lapses in my memory, speech deficits, and the other symptoms tied to my PCS.


On the last Sunday of this year, as I gathered with my siblings in Christ at a church I attended during my time at the Vancouver Academy of Music, I was reminded of his Faithfulness. I closed the service by playing the hymn: “Great is thy Faithfulness.”



Through the prayers and fellowship of my siblings in Christ, I am reminded our Lord was faithful in keeping me alive on July 26th. I know he will take me through this valley. He was faithful in bringing many new siblings of Christ into my life in 2025. I know our God will be faithful to us in 2026. Therefore I give thanks for all that he has done in 2025 and what he will do in 2026.



I am sharing the prayer and quote for 2026 in the hope that it will inspire you and bring you many blessings in 2026. Thank you for being a faithful part of my life in 2025! Happy New Year!


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